I’m so looking forward to Public Enemies, which opens tomorrow.
I don't have to work on Friday!
We’ll always have good memories of the legendary performer [Michael...– Steven Colbert, The Colbert Report
Sadly, my Microsoft Office trial ends today.
But I’m too stubborn to pay to buy it. Oh well. I can always go back to Word Perfect.
Download Firefox 3.5 here →
I forgot to take my meds this morning. Not good.
Good news: there's a sign posted in our office to...
I haven’t actually been told that we’re going to be closed on Friday, but I think the sign is a pretty good indication that we will be. I am excited now.
The girl sitting in the lobby waiting for my boss...
Oh wait. I can’t say that. I have a girlfriend. Oh, who cares. They’re both gorgeous.
I am determined to Moonwalk.
Me: Apparently, RM is now single.
Whit: Hahahahahahahaha gag!
Two young boys walked into a pharmacy and picked out a box of tampons, then walked to the cashier. The cashier noticed the box and asked the older of the two brothers, “Son, how old are you?” The boy replied, “I’m eight and a half.” The cashier continued, “Do you know what these are for?” “Well, not exactly, but they’re for him,” the...
I've been using a computer/typing for as long as I...
Is Transformers 2 the worst-reviewed movie to... →
Why does bottled water have an expiration date? →
I really hope that I get Friday off for the...
My friend is currently in New York and she keeps...
Firefox 3.5 launches tomorrow →
Free 15-Song Lollapalooza Sampler →
There is a giant fly that is stuck in the office...
My options are to either kill it or catch it and walk it all the way outside.
I got a splinter in my neck.– Cal, after running his neck along the deck railing
Too bad if a governor had to go missing, it couldn’t have been the governor of...– John Kerry. Sarah Palin is actually more offended by the implication that someone might not know who the governor of Alaska is. (via spiegelman)
In 1982, Larry Walters attached numerous balloons... →
He flew over the Long Beach Airport and was spotted by an airplane. The pilot radioed in, saying that he saw a man in a lawnchair holding a gun (incidentally, a pellet gun to shoot the balloons and lower his chair) floating at the same level of the plane. He was arrested upon landing. A reporter later asked why he did it and he replied, “A man can’t just sit around.”
It's a great feeling when you know you've...
The flashback sequence from the movie Up is...
I’m going [to] South America. It’s like America—but south.– Young Ellie, Up
I’m going so fast that I can’t slow down. It’s hard to get up...– California Waiting, Kings of Leon
Good morning starshine! The earth says hello.– K, in a text this morning
It's days like today that make me glad that my...
I couldn’t find anything to wear this morning so I walked into his room and borrowed/stole some clothes.
I'm glad that they're finally playing Michael...
The internets never lie.
Just ask them.
Perez Hilton is done.
Don't click this. I'm not playing around. →
davidmaddox: peacenotwar: weaponsoftruth: kyliebby: (via abeautifulstory) SERIOUSLY. DON’T. YOU.WILL.REGRET.IT. I was warned and yet I clicked it. Wow.
All I want in life is justice, cold diet pop and chocolate.– A woman with whom I am currently on the phone
The Sioux army, led by Chiefs Crazy Horse and...
Kristen Schaal, No Underwear She is hilarious and can always make me laugh.
I've been sick for a few weeks now. So, I finally...
My boss just had to explain what identity theft is...
Seriously? Have these people been living in a locked meat freezer for the past twenty years?
Remember how I said I planned to make a move this...
Just thought I would share because I can’t stop smiling. (Here’s a pic of us if you want to see how gorgeous she is. Oh, here’s another one.)
You, like, sneeze glitter. That’s how gay you are!– Flamboyant gay guy to butch gay guy (Overheard In New York)